Parenting Plans
Creating a workable parenting plan is crucial.
Creating a workable parenting plan is a challenge.
Some divorcing parents are able to work this out in a morning. Others, take more time.
And of course, some parents use post divorce mediation to fine tune child custody plan as the children get older or their relationships change.
Remember, the "best" plan is not a good plan if it isn't workable.
creating a Parenting Plan for Children under Age 3.
The guiding principle for children at this age is best summed up by,
"Consistent responses from their caregivers in the day-to-day activities ... fosters the sense of security that is the cornerstone for later development." Los Angeles County Superior Court Family Services
As you think about the ideal plan for your child consider whether both parents have been actively involved on a day to day basis. If both parents have been highly involved if would be good to maintain this pattern.
Parenting Plan Birth Through Age 6 Months
Three non-consecutive days per week for two hours each day.
Parenting Plan 7 Months through 12 Months
Three non-consecutive days for three hours each day.
Overnights are possible.
Parenting plan 13 months through 18 months
Three non-consecutive days each week for three to four hours.
One weekend day up to 8 hours. Overnights are possible.
Parenting Plan 19 months through 36 months
A weekend day for 10 hours.
A mid-week day for three hours.
Overnights are possible.
I’ve attached brochures from Los Angeles County Superior Court Family Services to give you an idea on possible plans.
Creating a Parenting Plan for Children Under Age 3
Creating a Parenting Plan for Children 3 to Five Years Old
Children in this age need consistency. They have don't have a well developed sense of time so long separations from their primary caregiver will create stress.
Sample 1
To ensure that child has contact with noncustodial parent.
Every Saturday or Sunday for eight to ten hours.
One weekday up to four hours.
Sample 2
To allow the noncustodial parent to take part in bed time rituals.
Alternate weekends from Saturday morning until Sunday evening.
One weekday for up to four hours.
Sample 3
Allow greater participation is school for the noncustodial parent.
Alternate Friday evening until Sunday evening.
One weekday for up to four hours or a midweek overnight extending to the start of school.
Download this brochure from Los Angeles County Superior Court Family Services on child custody.
Creating a Parenting Plan Age 3 to 5 Years.
Creating A Parenting Plan for Children 6 to 9 years old.
Children in this age group are starting to see themselves as a members of teams and classes. But, family is still a crucial means for them to develop feelings of security and belonging.
Sample 1
To allow mid-week contact.
Alternate weekends from Friday at 6pm until Sunday at 6pm.
One or two weekdays for 3 to 4 hours.
Sample 2
To minimize transitions and create less potential for parental conflict. Exchanges occur at school.
Alternate weekends starting after school on Friday and returning to school on Monday.
One midweek overnight starting and ending at school.
These samples can be adjusted to meet both parent's need and the child's needs.
Download this brochure from Los Angeles County Superior Court Family Services child custody.
Creating a Parenting Plan Age 6 to 9 Years.
Creating A Parenting Plan for Children 10 to 13 years old.
These children are not longer little kids and they aren't teenagers. They want the security of family and the acceptance of their peer group. These can be challenging years for everyone.
Sample 1
To keep non-residential parent involved in school and extracurricular activities. To minimize opportunity for conflict, all exchanges occur at school.
Alternate Fridays until Sunday Monday morning.
One mid-week overnight from Wednesday after school until the start of school on Thursday.
Sample 2
If the parents live far apart or where work schedules may midweek exchanges difficult.
Alternate Friday evening until Sunday evening or Monday morning.
Sample 3
This provides equal time with both parents.
One parent has every Monday before school until Wednesday before school. The other parent has every Wednesday after school until Friday after school.
Parents alternate weekends from Friday after school until Monday before school.
Sample 4
This plan minimizes transitions so that the child can settle into a routine.
Alternate weeks starting Friday after school
All transitions take place at school.
Download this brochure from Los Angeles County Superior Court Family Services on child custody.
Creating a Parenting Plan Age 10 to 13 Years.
Creating A Parenting Plan for Children 14 to 18 years old.
At this stage children want to develop an identity separate from their parents. Their focus is on friends, school and extracurricular activities.
Sample 1
To keep nonresidential parent involved in school and extracurricular activities.
Alternate Fridays evening until Sunday evening or Monday morning.
One midweek overnight from after school until before school on the following morning.
Sample 2
To provide significant time with both parents.
One parent has every Monday before school until Wednesday before school. And the other parent has every Wednesday after school until Friday after school.
Parents alternate weekends starting Friday after school until Monday before school.
Sample 3
To minimize transitions and allow the child to settle into their routine.
Alternate weeks from Friday after school until the following Friday after school.
Download this brochure from Los Angeles County Superior Court Family Services on child custody.
Creating a Parenting Plan Age 14 to 18 Years.
You don't have to do it alone.
I have helped a lot of people with this.
I’ve attached a set of parenting plan examples and a parenting plan checklist.