About

The World is Changing.

For the better.

This change will be so complete it will be hard to recall what life was like before the change.

Think of the smart phone.

Was there life before Uber, social media and the internet were in your pocket? Some say it was better but I struggle to even remember it.

Unresolved conflict obstructs our best life.

Who hasn’t looked over the fence at that shiny prize and thought, “I could never have that. But it is too…”. And now fill in the blank with an obstacle you imagined or someone else’s reason.

But maybe there was a way you could have it. The right questions at the right time can reveal interests and opportunities.

Virtual mediation will change your life.

Mediation is awesome and virtual mediation is even better.

Mediation gives both spouses more of what they want. A skilled mediator will help both of you unearth the foundations for the rest of your life. And the best part, all the choices are yours.

Yes, there are some divorces that need to be in family court, but they are the exception.

And virtual mediation means that you can remain in a safe comfortable space.

Is anyone going to miss driving to an attorney’s office to sit in a conference room with the soon to be ex? The box of Kleenex next to a bottomless cup of office coffee. Who wanted that anyway?

We can find our best choices.

As an old life breaks down a new life is created.

If we do this wisely, the pieces that were working can be carried forward to your new life. Your solution should be workable and durable.

The key? Make good choices.

But this won’t happen if we are under the complete influence of the most intense emotions.

And for some, the thought of untangling and understanding their often conflicting emotions is too much.

Instead, they hire a lawyer intending to push all the choices into family court where a judge will make a decision.

And that is so sad. All the choices and things that never were are wiped out by a judge’s signature. Wiped out.

The hardest thing is guiding parents through their emotions. Everything someone wants is tied to a memory and an emotion. And usually, these are in conflict.

Professional mediators have always had tools untangle this knot.

But virtual mediation is truly a game changer.

Physical space leads to emotional comfort.

When two soon to be ex-spouses are in a room together emotions rise.

When you are under stress your body releases Cortisol. It activates your body’s flight or fight response. It is ancient and it works great if you are facing a saber tooth tiger. Not so great if you are planning your future.

And researchers have learned when spouses who are in conflict and are in the same room their cortisol jumps. It is chemical. It occurs before anything is said. And all the choices slip a little farther away.

Virtual divorce mediation is so much better. You don’t have to be in the same physical space or in anyone’s face or space. There is breathing room.

If you live in the same house, each spouse can go into a different room.

And now that you aren’t together the cortisol isn’t amped up. And you have one less thing between you and the finish line.

Better boundaries Are better.

Online mediation creates boundaries that make it easier to have a productive discussion. There are fewer interruptions. People don’t over talk each other as much.

They become a bit more formal and courteous during online mediation.

It is surprising.

Maybe when people see themselves onscreen they use their “better behavior.”

Who knows why?

I look forward to the clever researcher who writes about this because I would like to know “the why” behind what I am seeing now.

Pushing Buttons is Harder

It is harder to provoke or be provoked during online mediation.

When we are in the same space we are under the influence of each other’s Pheromones. These are chemicals we release that act like hormones outside of the body. They fire up an emotional response before anything is said.

In other words..

Before their words push your button their pheromones have lit the fuse.

If you aren’t in the same room, your aren’t breathing their chemicals. You can shrug off many things they say.

Your favorite place is the best place to be.

Everything that happened before the mediation is part of the mediation.

Driving through horrendous LA traffic thinking through pre-divorce fears and feelings leaves most parents frazzled and unprepared to consider their choices. It takes time to get to a better frame of mind.

With online mediation, you can be wherever you need to be.

Your choose.

Bringing in additional professionals is Simple.

If you need your CPA, Therapist or other professional for 30 minutes. We’ll schedule them for 30 minutes. And that is all you need to pay for. They won’t need to drive crosstown, park and then bill you.

They can be at their desk with your information and office staff ready to help you.

It is so easy.

Sharing information is effortless

I use best in class software to help divide and model different asset divisions.

We’ll share screens so you can see the impact of your choices.

You Will Save Money

Online mediation tends to move faster so you will be in mediation for less time.

And.

40% of my rate used to pay for a “brick and mortar” conference room. I’m not paying that anymore so I reduced my rate.

You can keep what had been paid to a landlord.

The future of conflict resolution is online. Come join me.

Your future is waiting.